Friday, March 27, 2009

What Does It Mean to Have a Middle-Aged Birthday and be Marriage-Free?



It means you have to buy yourself your own damn birthday present!!


Here it is, as first seen on Homemade Hilarity:




My Vagina Wallet.

Teen Daughter says it's weird and creepy. I think she's jealous.


I also bought myself a birthday card:








So if you know any 25-year olds, email me. I'm available.


btw, thanks for all the kind comments on my coming out of the marriage-closet post. I promise I wouldn't play the distressed divorcee post too often.


Posted at Humor-Blogs.





25 comments:

Wicked Pissa Tees said...

LMAO! that wallet is hysterical :)

Lilacspecs said...

It's only sort of creepy cause it sort of looks like a mouth...

musing said...

Gotta have one of those wallets!

sage said...

The card is a hoot. If I'd known you're address, I would have been green and recycled my 50th birthday cards by packaging them up and shipping them off... that is if I hadn't thrown them away as I didn't want to be reminded that I'm a half century old.

Cult Diva said...

Where in the world did you get that wallet? That is a guarenteed conversation starter where ever you might go. Do they make a matching handbag?

TwoBusy said...

(...)

(...)

(left completely speechless by the wallet.)

(but still hoping you had a happy birthday.)

NannyGarcia said...

Love the wallet too!! And I hope your birthday was as goddamn fabulous as you are.

Jen said...

Happy Birthday, Meg!! I'll go through my stash of 25 yr olds and send one over to you asap. :)

ReformingGeek said...

At 25, they might no have that extra round ring around their bellies. I'll see what I can find for you!

;-)

As for the purse......um......

Bee said...

I didn’t know what it was at first so I thought it was a donkey mask ahahahahahahahahaaaa! :o)

for a different kind of girl said...

That is awesome! Pull that out and pay for your goods and services with glee!

Jenn Thorson said...

In that shot it actually looks like a Muppet gone awry, or possibly a draft puppet for Little Shop of Horrors' Audrey 2.

Stickman said...

Happy Birthday! It looks like you did about as good picking out a gift as a husband would so no need to miss having one, eh? A vagina purse. Classic.

The Retired One said...

I think the wallet needs a little bikini wax, there....

Happy Birthday.
I wouldv'e bought myself a nice diamond something, but if the wallet did it for you....then alrighty then!

KiKi said...

EWWWWWWWWW! bwhahahahahahahha!

Candice said...

Your wallet needs a shave or some wax in her life.

Love it!

Anna Lefler said...

Dude, I thought that was a Muppet and I kept looking at it going, "Which dang Muppet is that?"

Good Lord, it's not a Muppet, it's a hoo-ha!

Is that what they mean when they say "shake your moneymaker?" Or is it "moneyholder?"

I'm so out of the loop.

:^) Anna

Debbie said...

Good heavens that wallet may be the funniest thing I have seen in my entire life. And that is saying a lot.

Sami said...

Recently came across your blog and subscribed. First time I come back to read your latest post and you hit me (thankfully not literally) with a a vagina wallet! Too funny. I gotta get me one of those!

Chris Wood said...

With a wallet that good, everything will work out. I know it!

The best for everything.

Jeff said...

I'm just laughing at the thought of you plopping that thing down on the counter at McDonalds while you dig around in it with your fingers looking for change. Of course maybe some nice 25 year old man will ask you if he can help you with that! Eh?

Jocelyn said...

No way. My birthday was the 25th.

We're, like, twins--except I don't have a vagina wallet.

But I have a vagina, so, hell, look at us being twins!!!

JD at I Do Things said...

Happy Birthday, you fabulous creature!

And, no. I don't think your daughter is jealous.

Wynn said...

That really is a freaky scary wallet. I would be scared that it'd eat me.

mrsmouthy said...

Wow. I should be getting some royalties for the purse...how did they manage to photograph me when I wasn't looking?