Checking out my stats the other day I was delighted to see that people are actually reading this blog. So I did my Hippie Happy Dance--think Martha Graham to a feedback-y Wilco song.
But upon closer inspection I found out that many of them simply landed here by typing keywords into Google.
Here's the key words that got people to my fantasy life:
Couch surfing sexy Susie
Susan Sarandon hot You Tube
Biggest teen mammaries
Mommy mammaries
Cut her mammaries
Breastfeeding nursing fantasies
Best teen celeb cleavage
Skinny dip
I love daddy fantasy
Biggest communes in the US
Virgin looses her cherry
Fantasy eat semen
For the record I have never blogged about semen. I only mentioned semen in passing because that's what Chris Wood got Diesel for Christmas. The other stuff--sex, mammaries, communes, Susan Sarandon, couch surfing--guilty as charged.
Yet I am nothing if not an introspective blogger, so when I took those and other key words such as beer, Xanax, Vicodin, and Jeff Tweedy lyrics into account, I had a realization.
And it's not pretty.
All this time I thought I was just a Hip Mommy Blogger.
No.
Turns out my whole blog is about Sex and Drugs and Rock 'n' Roll!
Please Help.
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Stay tuned for more S & D & R & R when I reveal my top ten bloggy crushes.
posted at Humor-Blogs.
18 comments:
I don't even know HOW to check my google stats. All I go by is my counter, and I think that half of those numbers represent ME checking my blog 60 times a day to see if anyone was there.
Don't feel bad. I regularly post keywords that landed people on my page. Without a doubt the top is always "Scaly eyelids"
But right now i'm finding much amusement in how the person who typed in "You have a tiny marshmallow head" found their way to my blog ;-)
Man, you need to diversify. Throw 'em off with some out-there post titles. So far your google search hits all seem to be breast-centric. lol
Dana - Don't bother with stats. Unless you want to know stuff like the average time a reader spends on your page is 3 seconds. It's depressing.
Muse - The thing is--they're right on target. And btw, I think your lashes are lovely.
CableGirl - Seems like it's time again for me to show some cleavage, don't ya think?
I'm surprised 'hippie chick' didn't come up on that list. oh well, keep trying.
You gotta respect a good post about seamen
I've never been more turned on by a blog.
Yeah, there's nothing like a little web traffic stat analyzer to tell you the painful truth about yourself. Between your "Fantasy" and my "Panties" as blog titles, we pretty much have the whole porn searches covered, so ... kudos to us!!!!
Yeah...that's why I never look at my reader stats and prefer to stick with my comment stats instead. I've actually made fun of songs from the 70s and had the writer of the song find my blog and comment on it. Weird.
Well, duh, we knew that! Why do you think we come here?!?
Human - I think people who want Hippie Chicks just type in Joni Mitchell.
Suzie - Yes, but this is a family blog.
VE - Being a Hippie Chick I would NEVER make fun of songs from the 60s.
April - Ah, thanks.
Jeff - Hope you weren't reading it at a Starbucks or some other public place.
I thought that my blog was pretty cutting edge and exciting, but the most interesting recent google search was "worlds longest time spent in waffle house". Yawn.
OMG! A blog about Sex, Drugs and Rock 'n' Roll. Am I falling in with the wrong crowd.......again?
A Free Man - It's those cute baby pictures you post that keep you on the straight and narrow.
Sue - You're in with IN crowd, baby!
Awesome! I hope I'm in the Top 10 but sorta doubt it. I've let myself go lately.
I miss the filthy, filthy searches the last month since I moved URLs. Google hasn't found me quite yet. I used to get a lot of "boner" searches, and I miss them terribly.
Hi. I'm new. Just found you by googling "sex filth hooters drugs boner lick." Just the usual. Will stay with this great blog.
Dick
Is this kind of like the counter that tells you if your blog is at the GENIUS level or the PRE-SCHOOL level. I see nothing to be ashamed of with your designation as rocker chick blog.
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