Wednesday, January 14, 2009

It's a Buddhist-Free, Metaphor-Free Post

I'm going to interrupt my scheduled Tuesdays With Buddhist Buddy--The Straight One post because God, I mean...Enlightened One, we could all use a break.

Besides, I got to wondering if my posts about genitals, marijuana, and gay twinkies, including a photo of the very ah....fit award-winning blogger, Muskrat, would get me in trouble as I apply for jobs to work in the public school system.  

You see they are quite choosy these days about who they let work with children. Last Friday I had to have my finger prints taken and an FBI background check run.  

I'm not sure how thorough those checks are, but my gut tells me they might not be pleased to land on the same website that the dude who googled "psycho woman pussy good" landed on.

So we're Buddhist-free today.  

And metaphor free, too.  

Check out this Metaphor-Free radio station.  It cuts through the figurative language of song lyrics and tells it like it is.  Kinda like my Buddhist posts do.  

But without the snuggie.





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19 comments:

My Name Is Cat said...

That is too funny. This why clueless people should just stay that way.

sage said...

That's great! I laughed all the way through and now, please bring back the metaphor!

Anonymous said...

(This is our only source of communication now.) PLEASE GET A JOB!

Chris Wood said...

Well, if the FBI check your site, don't worry, none of us have any idea about Operation Big Clean.

So no more posts about furry bits and drugs? Awwwww ...

Chas said...

That clip was hilarious. I need a kleenex. And a new pair of undies because I laughed too hard.

for a different kind of girl said...

I'll never get a real job again if my blog is found using combinations of words used to find me now. Well, I could get a job, but I'd probably not respect myself much when I was older, and that's already on pretty low supply as it is.

The clip made me chock on my Honey Nut Cheerios. It was worth it!

Suzie said...

You mean psycho woman pussy good women dont make good job applicants. That just blows wads of cocaine

Kay said...

I too am looking for a new job... and I wonder what prospective managers think when they read my blog, if they read my blog.

Thankfully I only write porn under a fake name.

:P

JD at I Do Things said...

HA! Good one. "I'm on meth, I'm on meth!" Reminds me of this

http://www.holytaco.com/if-movie-posters-were-honest

"If Movie Posters were Honest"

JD at I Do Things

Anonymous said...

I've been asked (told) to stop leaving comments and to talk to Meg (Peggie) directly. Wouldn't want to disappoint, so as McLaughlin used to say, "Bye bye!" (Eleanor Cliff laughing in the background as she calls the other guests "mofo's.")

And if you don' get it, it must be nice. You've never had to worry about financial matters! But you do now....

Father Muskrat said...

This is good. I learned some things, too, as I didn't know what some of those songs meant 30 seconds ago. Come to think of it, I miss my young naivete.

That's for the shout out! If my father-in-law only knew what he created when he gave me that stupid ass snuggie for Christmas. Wow.

Candice said...

Psycho woman pussy is a bad thing?

Heinous said...

I don't get those stations around here. I guess that can't handle the undisguised truth

howboy said...

Thanks for the movie posters link, which further links to truth in ads and tv shows. tears are rolling down my cheeks.
I <3 truth in media.

My friend Patricia Pearson yesterday asked what's funny in these despairing times. Truth is a pretty good answer. Maybe you folks have other ideas? Let her know:
http://www.pearsonspost.com/weblog/blogger.html

Jenn Thorson said...

Metaphor Free radio-- pretty funny. Personally, I enjoy my music so confusing even the folks who wrote it aren't entirely sure what it's about anymore. But y'know, "Candle in the Wind" now has a whole new view for me. :)

Rickey Henderson said...

heh, well if your site wasn't attracting the googling weirdos, it certainly is now. Don't be overly shocked when Rickey mistakenly stumbles upon your site after searching for "masturbating Buddha."

A Free Man said...

I don't think you can have too much talk about Buddhists or metaphors. And the public school system needs a bit of shaking up anyway.

Irish Gumbo said...

Oh, man, I was laughing so hard, wooo! Great post! And I am not Googling, well, you know, THAT...

Thank you for the comments on my "Good Thing" post, I appreciate the eyes on the page. BTW, which photo did you mean re: Facebook?

And yes, DKM rocks! (So do the Pogues):)

My Name Is Cat said...

Hey, you are now an award winning blog. Come on over and get your prize.