I'm all for Teen learning to write--but a 1500-word essay on how a song of Teen's choice relates to Teen's world view...
The Song of Choice: Blowin' in The Wind
The World View: under-developed
The Word Count So Far: 327
Teen types frantically on the computer in the living room pleading, Mom, Mom what else can I write? What can I say? What does white dove sail mean to you? Help! This is due.
Welcome to Monday Morning.
Even though the assignment was started Sunday evening, it takes Writer/Teacher Mom to give him the expert last minute advice: just BS your way through it.
But how?
Did you include the lyrics?
No.
Wouldn't that give you 300 extra words?
Good idea. He copies and pastes the song. OK. Now I need 900 more.
Did you talk about Dylan's background? I mean, adding the name Robert Zimmerman a lone gives you 2 more words, doesn't it?
Great. OK. What else? What else? What else? he bangs the mouse on the desk.
Did you google the background of the song, I say pacing the room like Kramer. Did you write what Dylan said the first time he performed the song: this ain't no protest song?
Ain't...no...protest...song. That's 4 more words. I'm at 725.
Did you mention Pete Seeger?
Pete...Seeger. That's 727.
No, I mean that Pete Seeger identified the tune as a Negro spiritual.
Negro....spiritual... That's 803 words.
How about Peter, Paul and Mary? That's at least three more words, I add.
Actually that's four. He attacks the keyboard.
Did you mention Vietnam? Or Greenwich Village?
Did you mention Enabler? The Other Parental Unit calls from the kitchen?
Ignore that man behind the refrigerator, I command. Did you write about having seen Dylan in concert?
Great...that should give me another 34 words....
How about....
Well, I bet you can imagine the rest.
Or can you?
If you imagined that Teen came up 20 words short of the 1500 and being late for school, raced out of the house, madly backed up his car on the grass around the car parked behind it, and hit on first try, the fence and on second try, his dad's 1975 Cadillac...
then you've imagined correctly.
But hey. Teen's world view included world peace, anti-discrimination and gay rights.
And he did choose a Dylan song.
So This Enabler must have done something right.
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posted at Humor-Blogs
