Desperately Seeking Jeff Tweedy, Hoppy Ales and a Desiginated Driver (in that order)

God, I'm pathetic. Really, really pathetic.

Let me start at the beginning. Hell, let me start with a topic sentence and a few supporting details.

The People's Republic of Ann Arbor is known for many things. The first of which is the U of M football team. But because I live in Ohio State, I'm not permitted to say anything more under penalty of law.

Ann Arbor is also known as the liberal bastion of the Midwest--kind of like a Berkley minus the sun and San Andreas Fault. So it's of no surprise that during the election, Obama Hope banners were plastered throughout the city.



But being a city after my own Humor, a local business decided to change its banner on the day after the election:




Gotta love that.

Ann Arbor is also a city after my own Hops. Yes, Ashley's has 1,248, 894 beers on tap:









And as you know, I love me my Hops.

Lastly, Ann Arbor is also known for its support of the arts. In the summer there's the Ann Arbor Art Festival, in the Spring the Hash Bash , and in the winter, The Ann Arbor Folk Festival. 

This year the headliner on Friday was My Jeff Tweedy of Wilco. 

Yes, a rocker and experimental musician who once produced a song with 15 minutes of strange electronic synthesizer sounds, headlines a folk festival--gotta love that. 

And as you know, I do love me my Tweedy. 

Especially when he sings Ann Arbor's own original folk classic, I Want to be Your Dog.

But #$&$5w46qir%#$$#%sdf9347343$#&# is it hard to stalk this star!!!!!!

My offer of $5.00 and a photo on my blog only made the guard at the stage door grasp his gut and topple over with laugher.

Needless to say, not meeting this No Depression Star threw me into a deep depression. What could I do except drown my sorrows at Ashley's after the show?

And here's where the pathetic comes in.

I met a few foreigners there and we drank and drank and drank and basically closed the place down. Now I'm used to drinking with the Irish, who get drunk and sing songs such as I'd Love to Bang the Bangles.

But these guys were from some northern European country and seemed slightly more...how can I put it...anal...than the fun-loving and ever-romantic Irish. We ended up staying after hours and setting this up:

But no worries.  Ann Arbor is also the Mecca of Conservation, meaning all those bottles will be recycled.  

As for the Folk Festival next year, I'm stopping at the ATM to get a large amount of cash beforehand and wearing a pushup bra.  

'Cause when it comes to meeting My Jeff Tweedy, I must always maintain:

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More Hops and Hope at Humor-Blogs. 

BTW, gotta love that 59-year old Springsteen, eh?

How Do You Say 'I Suck' In French?

Teen is away at Christian camp for the week (he only joined Young Life for the pizza parties) and that means not only am I in charge of cooking for our French exchange student, Sacha, but I’m also chief social director.

Failed Outing 1 – I drive 35 minutes to the beach and no one gets in the water. So what if you can see a nuclear power plant on the opposite shore?


This is Sacha not wearing a swimsuit. Notice the headphones.

Failed Outing 2 – We take a bike ride along a parks trial and Ten-Year Old gets tired quickly and refuses to continue. It takes us an hour to walk the bikes back home.

Failed Outing 3 – I drive 55 miles to the Ann Arbor Art Fair only to discover the kids don’t like looking at art with 10,000 other people on a 92 degree day. I am certain the Mongolian Barbeque will be a hit. It isn’t. Sacha only eats a small salad, and by small I mean a serving size that actually fits in your palm just like Weight Watchers recommends.


This is Ten-Year Old at the fair in one of the happier moments

Failed Outing 4 – We see the Celtic rock band Seven Nations at a local pub. I look over at Sacha, who is always listening to hip hop through his giant headphones (see above), and notice his fingers plugging his ears. His fingers plugging his ears!!! And the bagpiper hasn’t even started yet!!!



Clearly I need help. Any suggestions?

I also need to maintain my ratings at Humor-Blogs. Please click for me so I can feel good about something in my life.